Title: The Words We Leave Unspoken
Author: L.D. Cedergreen
Genre: Contemporary Romance
Release: June 21, 2016
Goodreads Link: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30224226-the-words-we-leave-
unspoken
Blurb:
At thirty-six, Gwen Porter has always done the right thing. A selfless pillar of strength,
devoted wife and mother of two, she thrives on caring for those she loves. When Gwen
learns a shattering, life-changing truth, her deepest concern is telling her husband, John.
She finds herself on a destructive path of deceit and when her strength is tested, she
turns to the most unlikely person.
For Charley Brant, Gwen’s carefree, younger sister, life is about surviving another dead-
end job or her next train-wreck relationship. She lives in the moment, denying herself
any hope for a future. After years of relying on her sister’s handouts and support,
Charley finds herself in unfamiliar territory as she struggles to be the vessel of strength
that Gwen needs to navigate through the storm.
As Gwen faces her darkest fear and an uncertain future, Charley turns to the past,
unraveling secrets that will change everything that has come to define her. And in the
wake of a tragedy, each will come to recognize that sometimes the most important words
are the hardest ones to say.
PreOrder Links:
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Amazon AU - https://goo.gl/8r9ZhT
EXCERPT:
GWEN
I continue down the stairs and push open the guest bedroom door. Light seeps in from
the hallway, lighting a path from the door to the bed.
“Hi,” I hear Charley whisper in the dark from where she’s lying in bed with the blanket
pulled up to her chin.
“Couldn’t sleep?” she asks.
“No. You?”
“No,” she answers.
She peels back the bedding and I crawl into bed and lie next to her. She pulls the bedding
snug around us as we both lie on our backs and stare up at the ceiling. And I am
immediately taken back in time when we would do this very thing as children, after my
father left and my mother locked herself away, out of our reach. A time when our safety
net had been snagged out from underneath us and all we had was each other. Only it
was usually Charley who would seek me out in the dark. Lying next to each other, I
would take her hand in mine and we would whisper our fears under the veil of
darkness, and it was as if nothing else existed.
Charley speaks first, her voice barely louder than a whisper, quiet as a breath.
“I think Grey and I broke up,” she says.
I don’t respond. I just wait patiently for her to explain.
“He transferred me to another partner because he can’t work with me any longer. He
wants more.” She lets out a frustrated breath. I have heard this same story a million
times, each different and yet the same. They always want more from Charley but she
insists that she hasn’t more to give, nor does she want to. But it’s hard to miss the note of
disappointment and longing in her voice.
“And you don’t want more? With him?” I ask, although I think I already know the
answer.
“I don’t know.”
I’m shocked by her uncertainty. That was not the answer I was expecting. Treading
lightly, I ask, “It’s different with him, isn’t it?”
I hear her exhale loudly and then she says, “I feel something for him, but that scares me
more than the thought of losing him.”
I know that she only admits this because we’re lying in the dark, whispering like the
child versions of ourselves and she knows that I will never speak of it again. That
whatever fears and secrets she confides will be kept in the dark, a silent pact that we
made long ago.
“Maybe it’s time to take a leap of faith. Maybe it’s time to ask yourself if letting him go is
more unbearable than the fear of holding on.”
“The fear is crippling,” she whispers. And I know exactly what she means. I know that
kind of fear.
Charley is quiet for a long time. Her breath is even and calm, but I can feel her heart
beating erratically in her chest.
She reaches over and wraps her hand around mine. It’s my turn.
“I’m afraid to tell John. I’m afraid that what little strength I have will crumble and he’ll
see my weakness and I need to be strong for my family. I can’t fall apart, Charley. It’s like
keeping this from him holds me together, keeps me strong. I’m afraid that once I tell him,
I’ll shatter into a million pieces and never be whole again.”
Tears slowly trickle down my cheeks. It feels so good to say it out loud. My fears.
Charley remains quiet but squeezes my hand more firmly. Finally after what feels like
hours, she says, “Maybe it’s time you let go, Gwen. Maybe it’s time you let us be the
strong ones. It’s okay to fall. John and I will be there to catch you.”
A lonely sob escapes as if it has been locked away waiting for release.
“Remember when we used to sneak into Mrs. Dunmark’s backyard?” she asks, conjuring
images to mind from our childhood. I sniffle, wipe my eyes and take a deep breath,
welcoming the distraction.
“Yes, that woman never mowed her lawn,” I say, wiping my nose with the back of my
hand. “We used to pretend we were in a meadow, like in The Sound of Music.”
“Right. Remember when all the dandelions would turn from bright yellow to balls of
white, cotton tufts?”
“We called it our field of hope,” I remember with a smile, wondering where she’s going
with this trip down memory lane.
“We used to pull them from the ground one by one, close our eyes tight and make a wish
before blowing the seeds into the air. You always wished to marry Ralph Macchio,
remember?” Charley laughs quietly to herself and then says, “God, you were so obsessed
with The Karate Kid. I never thought he was that cute, but you dreamed of that guy.”
I do remember. I remember covering the walls of my bedroom with pictures of him, cut
out with care from magazines like Teen Beat and Bop. I guess some would call it an
obsession, but it was more like a distraction, an escape. And Charley’s right. I did love
that movie, but more because it gave me hope, wishing for a Mr. Miyagi to come and take
me under his wing.
“I would never tell you my wish. You would beg me to tell you, but I never did,” Charley
says.
“You were so stubborn like that,” I say with a small smile as I picture a string bean of a
girl standing in a field of weeds, arms folded across her chest in defiance as long brown
hair whipped across her face in the wind. So stubborn. “I was so afraid that if I told, it wouldn’t come true. But you know what I wished for
every single time?”
“What?” I ask.
“To be strong like you. You were my rock, still are. I wanted so bad to not be afraid
anymore.”
This confession pangs around in my heart, trying to find its place. I had no idea. I
remember being afraid of everything, worrying about Mother, having clean clothes,
what we were going to eat, how much money we had. Worrying about Charley, trying to
be strong for her.
“My wish was never to marry Ralph Macchio. Well sometimes it was,” I admit. “I usually
wished to be fearless like you, Charley. You had this roaring confidence. Like ‘what you
see is what you get.’. You never worried what people thought of you, you were always
yourself. You did whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted. You never worried about
the consequences. I was worried sick about everything and everyone. I guess I still am.
It’s exhausting.”
“I’ve never been fearless. Look at me, Gwen. I’m afraid to even throw out a receipt, just
in case I want to return something. I can’t even commit to a pair of designer jeans. I’m a
complete mess.”
“You’re stronger than you think, Charley.”
“So are you,” she says. We lay in the dark, quietly, lost in our own thoughts. And the
biggest fear I own bubbles to the tip of my tongue, begging to be told.
“I’m afraid to die,” I whisper, so quietly that I think she may not have heard me.
But after a moment, she squeezes my hand and then I hear her whisper just as softly,
“I’m afraid to die alone.”
Author Pic
Author Bio:
L.D. Cedergreen is the author of Ripple and Amazon’s bestselling novel, Gravity. She is
an avid reader and a music fanatic! Growing up in a small town in Washington State,
she loves to incorporate the beauty of the Pacific Northwest, as well as a small-town vibe,
in her books. She now lives in Southern California with her husband and two children.
You can follow her on twitter at @LDCedergreen.
Social Media Links:
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/L.D.-Cedergreen/e/B01FOYTAAM
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorL.D.Cedergreen/
Instragram: https://www.instagram.com/ldcedergreen/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/LDCedergreen
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7278430.L_D_Cedergreen
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